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Unpopular Opinion

I was going to post about this last week, but decided to wait. I’m glad I did.

We’re so lucky that Tori Amos meets fan at nearly every stop on her tours.

It’s been very difficult for me this tour to watch the same group of people at every meet & greet for every show that they’re attending. This means  people are being left out who have never had the chance. I saw this happen first-hand yesterday. Her tour manager warned us of the exact amount of time T. had that afternoon. Those familiar faces at the front of the line went into the venue and took their time coming out. The line barely moved. Tori only saw about one-third of the people waiting before we were told no one else would be let in. I stepped inside the doorway to have a quick look at her and walked away.

I witnessed several scenes of entitlement I won’t enumerate. I’ll add them to the list I’ve been carrying since the first show of the tour.  It should be understood, despite what you may think, Tori Amos is not your friend. The meet & greet is not a coffee date that she’s asked you out on. You won’t be getting a text message from her later to have a glass of wine. Fix your life. 

I have a lot of thoughts on this that won’t fit into this blog. It’s caused a sea change in what it means to me to be a Tori Amos fan. The thing that saved me yesterday was my best friend’s partner—a completely outside observer in this situation—saying, You seem to have great things going on in your life outside of this. This may be all that these people have. Empathy. Compassion. I have the capacity for those things.

But I’m angry. Demonstrating a lack of integrity pisses me off regardless of the situation. I’m also angry that people who have had the same opportunity to learn the lessons I have from Tori’s music and her example as a human being would treat others (Tori included) this way. I’m angry at the universe because sixteen years of staying away from meet & greets to allow others the opportunity did not gain me anything in this situation. Not yet, anyway.

Last night she did not play it, but she put “Never Seen Blue” on the setlist. it’s the song she played for me in 2001 at the same venue, adding a couple lines from my letter to her at the end. I’m going to consider this a psychic sonic hug to replace the one I didn’t get in person.

And I’m going to continue fighting to live my life, the one she helped save, in a way that would make her proud. It’s the best way to show my gratitude.

Reblogged from russmarshalek  3 notes

To catch you up quickly, there’s a weird school of thought/sub-sect of Tori Amos “fans” for whom at some point she just stopped. Whether it’s after her first three albums, after her electronic dabbling run, after her label change, after her covers album, after her “classical” album, hell I don’t know because I do know she’s continued to put out important, quality, canonically great music almost biannually since I began listening to her in my teens, there are now people, a great number of people, for whom “I listen to Tori Amos” means “I listen to x number of albums from x time period and oh she’s doing something new? Oh ok I hope she plays Cornflake Girl.” And that angers me irrationally. It might have something to do with Grimes being the au currant feminist female musician hero. It might have something to do with how I feel on any given day. But Tori being treated as having a “comeback” or being a nostalgia act at any point of her career thus far fills me with a blinding, blood-red rage.

To put it simply: Tori hasn’t ever disappeared since Little Earthquakes. WHERE THE FUCK Y’ALL BEEN, HMM?

So seeing Tori last night in NY for what, for better or for (oh, so much worse) her team has managed to brand a “comeback tour”, brought out the absolute worst in me and the way I view my concertgoing fellows. As such, I present to you: The 5 Kinds Of People Who Make Seeing Tori Amos in 2014 Disastrous For My Mental Health. Please note, this list is intended for entertainment purposes only and any personal offense lobbed or contained within is entirely intentional because you deserve it:

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i saw tori amos at the beacon last night and legit everyone pissed me off.  (via russmarshalek)

Reblog all day long. Except I really love “Mountain”.